Happiness At Work #128 ~ all about how we use our minds

Clouds Floating Along ID: 257779 © Marilyn Barbone | Dreamstime Stock Photos

“Once your mindset changes, everything on the outside will change along with it.” 
― Steve MaraboliLife, the Truth, and Being Free

“The mind is a powerful thing. It can take you through walls.” 
― Denis AveyThe Man Who Broke Into Auschwitz: A True Story of World War II

“What we believe is what we see.” 
― Sukant RatnakarOpen the Windows

These are just three quotes that illustrate the extraordinary power of our minds.

And this same idea of the importance of how we choose to think about things is central to our increasing intelligence about what helps to make and keep greater happiness, resilience, relationships and personal mastery in our work and lives.

This month’s collection of Happiness At Work articles reverberate this theme and I have brought together some of the top stories here.

Read The Poem Bringing Happiness To People Across The World

This uplifting poem is opening hearts all over the world, from the Hasidic Jewish community of New York to the streets of London. Its cross-cultural message? That we can choose happiness each and every day by adjusting our point of view.

And its journey from a high school girl’s pen to viral fame by way of a London bar and a downbeat Facebook status is pretty cool too.

A snapshot of the poem went viral on TwitterReddit and Imgur, where it was viewed 1.3 million times.

Here it is the poem by Chanie Gorkin, an 11th Grade girl from Crown Heights Hassidic Jewish Community, making the point about the power of our thinking brilliantly…

Today was the absolute worst day ever

And don’t try to convince me that

There’s something good in every day

Because when you take a closer look,

This world is a pretty evil place.

Even if

Some goodness does shine through once in a while

Satisfaction and happiness don’t last.

And it’s not true that

It’s all in the mind and heart

Because

True happiness can be obtained

Only if one’s surroundings are good

It’s not true that good exists

I’m sure you can agree that

The reality

Creates

My attitude

It’s all beyond my control

And you’ll never in a million years hear me say that

Today was a good day

Now read from the bottom up

Three Cognitive Biases That Alter Your Thinking

“Change your thoughts and you change your world.”
~Norman Vincent Peale

From this quote, Bob Dempsey provides this really helpful outline of how subjective our judgements and decision making really are…

Cognitive Bias is defined as a pattern of deviation in judgement, whereby influences about other people and situations may be drawn in an illogical fashion. Cognitive bias is a general term used to describe many observer effects in the human mind, some of which can lead to perceptual distortion, inaccurate judgment, or illogical interpretation.

In layman’s terms: A gap in between how we should reason and how we do reason.  Thinking irrationally – judging or favoring a person, group, or thing in an unfair way.

As much as you may not notice them, biases are ingrained into our decision making from birth. Biases are one of the more interesting phenomena of evolved mental behavior.  The brain has evolved to make us believe that we’re special, valuable, and capable.  Biases help you to feel unique and overcome the strains, struggles, and challenges of your life.  Biases help you to avoid second guessing yourself or feeling like a fool.  We are biased in a variety of areas: from bias to live in certain climates and temperature ranges, to seeking out certain types of foods and tastes.

You can imagine the potential time pressures that our ancestors faced.  The ability to make split second decisions is essential for survival.  The speculation is that biases evolved in part to help us decide quickly and effectively; to quickly sample the information available to us and to focus on the bits relevant to our current task or situation. In short, biases help guide us and keep us safe.

Research into human judgment and decision making over the past 60 years in cognitive science, social psychology, and behavioral economics has established an ever increasing and evolving list of cognitive bias.  There is a non exhaustive list of over 100 cognitive biases on Wikipedia. Although cognitive biases help us to feel amazing about our capabilities and self image, they also have their drawbacks.  They lead to poor choices, bad judgments, and erroneous insights.

Cognitive Biases Effect:

  • Memory
  • Motivation
  • Decision making
  • Probability judgments
  • Perceived causes of events
  • Group evaluation and selection
  • Having a positive attitude towards oneself

Biases emerge from a diversity of mental processes that can be challenging to pinpoint. These mental processes include heuristics (problem solving mental shortcuts ), framing (presentation), mental noise, moral and emotional motivators, and social influences.

The goal is not to completely remove your biases, but to become aware and adjust for them.  By recognizing that you’re thinking is subject to influence, you can work towards a higher level of control.  You can simultaneously correct and broaden your perspective.  It’s actually quite amusing when you start noticing and challenging your own biases and untwisting your perceptions.  The danger of not becoming aware of your biases is to think that you’re always right.  It is vital to notice that the world looks different for other people.  Dropping our biases enable us to listen and connect to each other much more effectively.

Three Predictable Cognitive Biases.

While this is slightly tongue-in-cheek, these are a few biases that are fairly consistent among people. It doesn’t take long to spot yourself using these and adjust for them.

1) Confirmation Bias

The tendency to look for or interpret information that confirms your preconceptions.

You want to be right about how you see the world.  Your opinions are a product of constantly seeking out information that confirms your beliefs, while disregarding contradictory information that does not.  You like to be told what you already know, so you apply a filter called confirmation bias. Your brain is helping you confirm that you’ve made the correct choice. (and you have by reading my blog) Focusing on certain things can help prevent us from being lost. Confirmation bias it is essential to piece together a coherent world.

Visiting political websites that hold the same opinions, watching a news channel that tells you what you want to hear, keeping company with people that hold the same beliefs as you – are all examples of confirmation bias.  These preferential behaviors keep you comfortable and avoid cognitive dissonance.  The internet has increased this behavior.

If you’ve ever purchased a car, you may have started to notice the brand you’ve chosen everywhere you looked.  While researching and after purchasing an Infiniti G35, I was seeing them everywhere!

2) Priming

“An implicit memory affect in which exposure to one stimulus influences a response to another stimulus.”

Priming is an exposure to something that effects your later behavior in some way, without you being aware of the earlier influence.  Unconscious priming effects can be very noticeable and last long after you’ve consciously forgotten.

Craving Italian food after watching “The Godfather”, walking slower after thinking about the elderly, being more argumentative after seeing “A Few Good Men”, having more patience after reading words that have to do with politeness – are all examples of priming.

Priming can be as simple as you reading the word table in your news feed, and if asked later to complete a word starting with tab, you’re more likely to answer table because you have been primed. This is also why when someone asks you for a word related to blackboard, you’re likely to choose classroom.

3) Framing Effect

“Reacting to a particular choice in different ways depending on whether it is presented as a loss or a gain.”

You routinely come to different conclusions about the same problem, depending on how it’s presented. Perception of loss or gain drives human decision making in every aspect of our existence. You avoid risk (risk aversion) when a negative frame is presented, but seek risk (risk seeking) when a positive frame is presented.

Language plays a key role in framing and can evoke completely different reactions to something. Responding differently after hearing “Obama Care” as opposed to “The Affordable Care Act” or “Global Warming” as opposed to “Climate Change” – are examples of the framing effect.

I’ll leave you with the following experiment on framing by Amos Tversky:

Participants were offered two alternative solutions for 600 people affected by a hypothetical deadly disease:

  • Option A saves 200 people’s lives
  • Option B has a 1/3 chance of saving all 600 people and a 2/3 possibility of saving no one

72% of participants chose option A

They offered the same scenario to another group of participants, but worded differently:

  • If option C is taken, then 400 people die
  • If option D is taken, then there is a 1/3 chance that no people will die and a 2/3 probability that 600 will die

In this group, 78% of participants chose option D (equivalent to option B)

The above experiment showcases the nature of framing.  The two groups favored different options because of the way the options were presented.  The first set of participants were given a positive frame (emphasis on lives saved), whereas the second set were given a negative frame (emphasis on lives lost).

Why This Matters.

It is beneficial to be aware of the processes influencing our judgments. Having background knowledge on how the mind actually works is essential for logic, reasoning, argumentation, and critical thinking.  It also allows us to be aware of manipulation and influence by others on these biases. (marketing firms, political campaigns)

Cognitive biases are also related to the persistence of superstition, to large social issues such as prejudice, and they also work as a hindrance in the acceptance of non-intuitive scientific knowledge by the public.

How To Have a Better Commute

Shawn Achor, one of our favourite happiness at work experts, on how we can harness the power of our minds to turn our travel to work time to greater advantage…

Are there ways to make your commute happier? Research says yes!

The question is how to choose happiness when life is stressful. The key is to redefine the drive toward happiness. After spending 12 years at Harvard University studying the connection between happiness and success, I realized I had been pursuing it wrong. While modern society tends to define “happiness” in terms of pleasure, the ancient Greeks defined it as “the joy we feel growing toward our potential.” This definition changes the pursuit of happiness. Joy is something you can experience even when life is difficult or unpleasant — including on your often-stressful morning commute.

Now nearly two decades of research show that, scientifically, happiness is a choice, and happiness is an incredible advantage. When we choose to focus on the positive and pursue joy even when life is challenging, our business, educational, and health outcomes improve.

Here are five positive habits you can develop to ensure you have a happier commute:

1. Slow down.

We think we’ll be happier once we get to work, but research shows it’s actually the opposite. If you speed, and feel unconsciously stressed and less safe, you arrive at work more fatigued and LESS happy. Avoid the urge to speed! And pick a car that makes you feel safe. If you feel safe, your negative stress drops, which means that your body has time to recover and recharge in the car rather than feeling exhausted by the time you get home.

2. Travel in company.

If possible, bring along a passenger! Social connection drives happiness. The greatest predictor of happiness is the breadth, depth, and meaning of our relationships. Social connection is as predictive of how long you will live as obesity, high blood pressure or smoking. And people who feel high social connection are 40% more likely to receive a promotion.

3. Shift your mindset.

Our brains crave novelty and save extra energy to use on new tasks. So when possible, try taking another route to get to your destination. Instead of trying to minimize your commute, try to maximize the energy and happiness you feel when you get there. If you arrive at work with a positive brain, your productive energy rises by 31 percent, so you can actually get home earlier!

4. Make sure you are comfortable.

There is a great connection between our minds and our bodies, so if our bodies feel comfortable in the car because of good design, then our brain can devote more resources to the positive — even taking time to perfectly adjust your seat matters. Otherwise you waste valuable resources unconsciously trying to decrease the uncomfortable feeling.

5. Invest wisely.

Research shows your brain’s happiness adjusts to a bigger house in six months, but it never fully adjusts to traffic because it is different each day. So, if you are going to be in traffic, it is crucial to be in a car that makes you happy. More expensive doesn’t necessarily mean better. In fact, if you feel like you got a good value for your car, you may feel happier for longer with that choice. And ultimately, if your car makes you feel calm, that will help short circuit the anxiety of traffic.

The bottom line: Quite simply, happiness lies in the journey — not the destination! By following these five simple ways to increase your happiness during your morning commute, you’ll be setting a great foundation to be prepared for happier, more successful, and more rewarding experiences once you arrive at work in the morning and at home at the end of the day.

Watch also on Huff Post Live:

Happiness Expert Shawn Achor on Positive Thinking

Five Powerful Lessons Gratitude Can Teach You

Jeff Charles outlines how and why practising gratitude benefits us…

The Science Of Gratitude

The evidence for the impact of gratitude isn’t just anecdotal. There is scientific evidence for the benefits of gratitude. There have been numerous studies on the effects of gratitude. It’s been scientifically proven to improve the lives of those who practice it…

Gratitude leads to greater relationships

When you express heartfelt gratitude to someone else, you are showing them how important they really are. You’re drawing attention to an action they took that made your life better.  When someone hears that something they did had a positive effect on someone else, it makes them feel important. It shows them that they matter.  By showing the people around you that they matter, you could literally make their day!  Additionally, since you know that you’re brightening someone else’s day by making them feel important, you’re also doing something important as well. This is why expressing heartfelt gratitude to someone who isn’t expected doesn’t just benefit them, it benefits you too…

Gratitude makes you mentally stronger

Living a grateful lifestyle can make you mentally tougher. It doesn’t mean you won’t still have to deal with stress. It just means that you’ll be able to deal with it much easier. Stress won’t have as debilitating an effect if you’re practicing gratitude regularly…

Gratitude makes you healthier

Gratitude is not only great for your mental health, it can help you physically too. It can boost your immune system and make it easier for you to adopt healthier habits. It’s been shown that those who practice gratitude also participate in other healthy activities such as exercising and eating healthier….

Gratitude makes you more productive

Robert A. Emmons, one of the leading authorities on the science of gratitude said this about one of his studies:  “Participants who kept gratitude lists were more likely to have made progress toward important personal goals (academic, interpersonal and health-based) over a two-month period compared to subjects in the other experimental conditions.”…

Gratitude makes you happier

Finally, gratitude makes you much happier.  Gratitude enables you to really see how much you have to appreciate and feel positive about. Not only that, expressing gratitude draws more attention to this because reactivate it…

It’s actually been shown that people who live a more grateful lifestyle become 25 percent happier than those who don’t. Want to be happy? Become more grateful…

The Lies your Tired Brain Tells You

by Dan Waldschmidt

If you’re not tired, you’re not working hard enough.

And if you are working hard enough, your brain is tired.

How you feel, how quickly you figure things out, how you interpret what happens to you — that is all computed, calculated, and configured by your brain.

Sometimes it’s a lie.

What you think is true is really just a complicated deception orchestrated by your mind to make you feel better about your current situation. It’s done to protect you.

But in the process you’ll feel pretty convinced of some outrageous nonsense.  You’ll find yourself buying into lies that will cripple your ability to amazing.

Here are a few of those lies:

  • “My life is so much harder than everyone else…”
  • “It doesn’t matter what I do. Nothing works…”
  • “My life would be so much better if I only had more money…”
  • “I can’t get ahead because everyone is always picking on me…”
  • “I didn’t do anything wrong. I’m not doing anything wrong…”
  • “No one would understand anyway…”
  • “That won’t work. I already tried it once…”

Lies. Damn lies.

All of them. And you’ve probably found yourself using a few of those lies to justify staying in a funk. To justify staying demotivated, uninspired, and angry at the world.

Instead of telling you that hard work and doing hard things is just what needs to be done, instead of telling you to “suck it up and get back to work” — your brain automatically gives you a sophisticated way out.

A one-way ticket to more frustration. A fast path to a life of staying stuck.  All because you listen to the lies that your overworked brain creates in order to try to protect you from more pain, sweat, blood and tears.

Don’t let lies destroy you.

Fight the urge to give in, give up, or go away.

Just because you “think it” doesn’t mean it’s true. Just because you have a good reason or justifiable excuse doesn’t mean it’s true.

Just because you’re worn out, beaten down, and not sure you can make it doesn’t make the lies you tell yourself true. They’re still lies.

Maybe it’s time to tell yourself something else, like “what’s the one thing I could do right now that would make things a little better…?”.

Four Steps to Freedom from Negative Thinking

Elisha Goldstein outlines a process she has developed to help us to shift our thinking away from negative spirals and mind traps…

Mind traps are styles like catastrophizing, blaming, exaggerating the negative and discounting the positive or just your most common negative thoughts.

When you first notice a mind trap or common negative thought, first stop, take an intentional deep breath and from this more mindful space, move through these next four steps (Name, Feel, Release, Redirect):

  1. Name it – Actually name the style of thinking or behaving that isn’t serving you in your mind or say it out loud (e.g., overeating, catastrophic thinking, grumpiness, etc.). This not only creates more awareness for you, but also has been found to bring more activity to the part of your brain that has to do with emotional regulation.
  2. Feel it – Recognize how this moment feels in the body. This grounds us to the reality of the moment and gives us access to a choice point.
  3. Release it – Practice this phrase in concert with the breath, “Breathing in, I acknowledge the feeling that’s here; breathing out, I release it.”
  4. Redirect it – Shift your attention to something that is healthier and/or more important to pay attention to.
    Bring this awareness into the moments of your day, dropping into what really matters.

Remember, most importantly, this is a learning process. That  means don’t measure success by whether “it works” every time or not, instead you’re training your brain to name, recognize, release and redirect. 

Mastery is only created with a learning mindset. Like learning how to ride a bike, as you practice and repeat this over time, your brain will start making this more automatic.

Eight Ways To Turn A Horrible Day Into A Positive Day

by Theo Ellis

What’s the first thing you do when you’re having a horrible day?

Do you become so negative you infect anybody who comes into contact with you? Only to regret it or apologize later?

Do you over think the situation, say horrible things to yourself, beat yourself up and over exaggerate everything?

Do you fall into self pity, self hate, turn off your phone and shut everybody out?

There are better ways to handle horrible days. We all experience them, and I’m no exception.

Here’s how you can turn  a horrible day into a positive day.

1. Change your perspective.

When you wake up every day, you have two choices. You can either be positive or negative; an optimist or a pessimist. I choose to be an optimist. It’s all a matter of perspective. – Harvey Mackay

Perspective is defined as the way you see something. Your life and your attitude is a reflection of the way you see the world.

If you want to turn a bad day into a good day, all you’ve got to do is change the way you see it.

Instead of seeing it as horrible, negative, bad or ugly, see it as nothing more than a life lesson.

See it as nothing but an experience that’s going to benefit you in the long run. Whether that’s by making you a stronger, smarter, or wiser person.

That which does not kill us makes us stronger. – Friedrich Nietzsche

2. Get out of the “thinking zone”.

You see when things go bad, horrible, and straight up ugly, we put ourselves in a mental prison.

And when we’re in this mental prison, we do nothing but think, think, and think some more.

We think about how awful the situation is.

We think about how stupid we are, or how naive we are.

We think about how much of a failure we are, or how things just aren’t going “right”.

And we think about what we could of done better, and how we could of changed it.

In 4 words, we stress ourselves out. Because we’re too busy sitting in the thinking zone!

The solution is simple. Get out of the “thinking zone” and stop stressing yourself out.

What’s done is done. Winding yourself up like a clock isn’t going to make your day any better. Only worse.

3. Look at things that have gone well.

What’s gone well for you today? If today hasn’t gone too well for you?

Don’t say “nothing” because that simply isn’t true. You’re just focused on the wrong things so you’re not able to see it.

If somebody reached out to help you today, that’s something positive.

If an opportunity has come your way, an opportunity you’ve been expecting, that’s something positive.

If you’ve received good news about that job you applied for, that’s good news.

If your business has picked up all of a sudden and your seeing growth, that’s good news. Am I right?

There’s always something that’s gone well within 24 hours, you just need to acknowledge it.

4. Slap some uplifting music on.

There’s no better drug than music. I say drug because music is not only that addictive, but the feeling it gives you has no comparison.

Not only that, but music has the ability to improve your mood within such a short time.

Plus music has the power to make you happy, and release endorphin’s in your brain (backed by science).

5. Avoid negative people.

You cannot have a positive life and a negative mind. – Joyce Meyer

And you can’t have a positive mind If you’re around negative people. The last thing you need when you’re having a horrible day is to be around negative people.

Whether that’s family, friends, associates, or naysayers.

You want your day to be as  positive as possible, not negative. And being around negativity won’t solve your problem, it’ll worsen it.

6. Be productive.

Being productive gives people a sense of satisfaction and fulfillment that loafing never can. – Zig Ziglar

When I’m productive, even If I’m having a “bad” day, I feel so much better. You know why? Because I’m not focused on the negative.

All I’m focused on is producing, creating, reading, and working towards my goals. Nothing else.

The same thing works for anybody. When you’re focused and productive, you don’t have time to be stressing, worrying, and complaining.

The aim is to be more productive than unproductive.

That way, when you are having a bad day, it won’t phase you as much. And you’ll feel much better.

7. Do what makes you happy.

True happiness comes from the joy of deeds well done, the zest of creating things new. – Antoine de Saint-Exupery

When you’re doing what makes you happy, what you love, and what you’re passionate about, everything else gets blanked out.

You know the feeling when you’re doing something you enjoy so much that you forget what time it is?

That’s what I’m talking about. Do that, and commit to doing that everyday.

Then it’ll be harder for you to ever experience a “bad” day.

8. Get out of the past.

The first recipe for happiness is: avoid too lengthy meditation on the past. – Andre Maurois

If you’re not careful the past will swallow you whole like an anaconda feeding on its prey.

Regardless of when your “bad day” started, it’s now in the past. Even if the day isn’t over yet.

Remember, the past is defined as something that’s already happened. So If it’s already happened, why bother with it?

Get out of the past and start focusing on something more meaningful. The past can’t help you, won’t help you, and doesn’t care if you dwell on it.

8 Ways to Vacation Right and Recharge Your Health

Corinne Ruff provides tips from the experts for how to optimise our time off for our health, wellbeing and happiness…

Experts say overloading without taking time to recharge isn’t healthy. “It might seem counterintuitive when you have a lot of work to take time off,” says Karen Osterle, a psychotherapist and marriage counselor in the District of Columbia. “But the problem is we’re not working efficiently if we’re in a constant state of stress. We need to break away from that in order to feel replenished.”

How do you know when it’s time to get away? It’s all about understanding the needs of your body, Osterle says. The body is like an ecosystem that wears and tears if it’s not taken care of, she explains. “When one part of the system is knocked out of balance, the rest of our physicality suffers,” she says. “That includes eating, sleeping, exercise, relationships, sex and affection.”

In general, she recommends taking a three-day weekend at least once every two months and a real vacation, of a week or more, once a year. But simply booking a vacation isn’t enough. Whether you’re taking a day or a week off, here’s how experts say you should spend your vacation days to prioritize your health.

1. Tune in to relieve stress. Start ​the day by improving your relationship with yourself. A few minutes of “me time” on a morning walk can improve productivity throughout the day, Osterle says. “If you’re going to take a day off, take a few minutes to look around and say, ‘Whoa, ​[I’m] out of balance here, but not here. … What is that I keep saying ‘yes’ to, or I should say ‘no’ to?’” she says. Meditation ​can also help you concentrate on abdominal breathing, which reduces stress and anxiety, according to The American Institute of Stress.

2. Plan to alleviate anxiety. When you take a day off, don’t expect to completely catch up on paying bills, cleaning the house, working out and going out with friends. Instead, Osterle says to be realistic about what you can accomplish in a day, given the number of distractions​ you may face (like making the kids an after-school snack or taking the dog for a walk). “Much of the time when we take a step back, it increases productivity, and we feel agency over our schedule and our flexibility,” says Dr. Jennifer Wolkin, a psychologist at the Joan H. Tisch Center for Women’s Health at NYU Langone Medical Center​. Wolkin adds that it’s important to​ balance work and time off to decrease anxiety about the internal conflict between the two. For example, she says it’s OK if you need to spend a few hours working during your vacation, but wait until the kids go to bed to make sure you don’t miss out on family time.

3. Set boundaries to feel calmer. Before going on vacation, decide how much time you’re going to spend working and when you’re going to do it. That way you’ll feel calmer about going offline for a few hours, Wolkin says. Turning your phone off may not be realistic for everyone, but turning off your ​email and social media notifications is one way to limit screen time while trying to relax at the beach and spend quality time with friends and family​.

4. Sleep more to re-energize. Little sleep ​mixed with high stress is a recipe for burning out. Besides making you irritable and tired, sleep deprivation can have negative consequences on your cognitive performance and efficiency, says Max Hirshkowitz, chairman of the board of the National Sleep Foundation​. “Catching up on sleep is good for your health, spirit and happiness,” he says. “Evidence shows people perform better when they get adequate amounts of sleep.” To feel rested and productive, the NSF says adults should aim for at least seven hours of sleep per night. “Reserve that time,” Hirshkowitz says. “Make it an important thing you need.”

5. Be present to revitalize your relationships.​ A few days off can rekindle relationships that have suffered because of your working life. A survey by Project: Time Off published in July found that not taking time off can hurt close relationships. Of ​the 1,214 U.S. adults surveyed​, the average worker misses about three events a year, the most common being a child’s activity. ​About 43 percent of people surveyed said they spend less than 20 hours a week with their family, yet 73 percent said spending time with family is important for a fulfilling life. “We’re cheating on our families with work,” says Katie Denis, senior director of Project: Time Off. She adds that it’s critical to make time for meaningful conversations while on vacation.​ ​Even a few hours of face-to-face time with your spouse or kids can make a difference, Osterle says. “Vacation is about connection above all else, the self-connection to nature and the earth and the connection to your loved ones,” she says. “It’s about getting present.”

6. Balance choices to relieve food guilt. Most people are going to drink on vacation — that’s a given, says Keri Gans, a registered dietitian and contributor to the U.S. News Eat + Run blog​. But​ setting a goal to avoid drinks with mini umbrellas​ will prevent you from feeling guilty about your choices later. “Stay away from the sweetened cocktails, the frozen drinks, the strawberry daiquiris,” she says, adding that it’s better to stick to drinks that don’t have a lot of added sugar. ​Gans also recommends planning healthy meals so you don’t settle for greasy fast food.​ But you’re still on vacation, so it’s OK to indulge in moderation. “Whether it’s at breakfast, lunch or dinner, allow yourself one more decadent choice than usual per day,” Gans writes in “7 Tips for Healthy (Enough) Eating on Vacation.”

7. Stay active to feel rejuvenated. Vacation should be relaxing, but Gans recommends people do more than lie on the beach and drink piña coladas all day. “It doesn’t mean you need to run every day if you’re clearly not a runner, but try new, fun activities like kayaking or going for a hike or checking out a new yoga studio,” she says. Exercise can also improve ​your mood and make you more energized throughout the day, according to the American Psychological Association. That extra energy will come in handy so you can take the kids sightseeing around town. 

8. Cultivate other interests to improve happiness. Branch out. “It’s essential to have outside hobbies from work,” says Phil Shils, physician assistant at Hospital Sisters Health System Medical Group​. To feel refreshed and happier at the office, Shils recommends ​trying new activities​ on vacation that you can continue throughout the year​, such as biking or playing tennis. “Any time you’re out of your routine, your brain remodels itself and refreshes,” he says.​ When the weekend rolls around, Clarke makes time for softball games in a local league. Even if it’s only for a few hours, she says getting away from her desk helps keep her mind off the stress of long days filled with back-to-back calls.

With all the calls, emails and high stress, it doesn’t take long before work starts to take a toll on your health. “If we get into a work vortex, it’s too easy to adopt a default stance of saying ‘no’ to people and activities that are replenishing for us,” Osterle says. “[Vacations] give us a chance to recalibrate.”​​

Vacation and the Art of Presence: Anais Nin on How To Truly Unplug and Reconnect Your Senses

by Maria Popova

Three decades before Susan Sontag lamented the “aesthetic consumerism” of vacation photography, which commodifies the experience by prioritizing its record over its livingness, and more than half a century before we came to compulsively catalog every private moment on the social web, Nin writes:

I am lying on a hammock, on the terrace of my room at the Hotel Mirador, the diary open on my knees, the sun shining on the diary, and I have no desire to write. The sun, the leaves, the shade, the warmth, are so alive that they lull the senses, calm the imagination. This is perfection. There is no need to portray, to preserve. It is eternal, it overwhelms you, it is complete…

Faced with the radically different disposition of the Mexican locals, she considers what they know about living with presence that the society from which she escaped does not:

The natives have not yet learned from the white man his inventions for traveling away from the present, his scientific capacity for analyzing warmth into a chemical substance, for abstracting human beings into symbols. The white man has invented glasses which make objects too near or too far, cameras, telescopes, spyglasses, objects which put glass between living and vision. It is the image he seeks to possess, not the texture, the living warmth, the human closeness…

Fifteen Simple Things You Can Do To Stay Happy At Work

Chloe Bryan & Vicky Leta outlines the simplest things we can do to increase our happiness at work, from beautifying our workspace or taking a walk to setting tiny goals or taking a break…

One Woman Photoshopped by 18 Countries: Beauty Standards Revealed

Here is further evidence of what most of us suspected that although ‘beauty might be in the eye of the beholder’ the beholder is subject to some pretty strong cognitive and cultural biases…

The same portrait of a woman was sent out to 18 freelance designers in 18 countries around the world with these simple instructions that were given by the market agency Fractl, which was commissioned for this project:

Photoshop her form. The idea is to Photoshop and retouch this woman to make her more attractive to the citizens of your country. We are looking to explore how perceptions of beauty change across the world. Multiple designers are involved. You can modify clothing, but her form must be visible. No nudity. All other changes, including those to her shape and form, are up to you.

“We focused on female designers, as we wanted a woman’s view of what her culture finds attractive and to understand more about the pressures they face,” the project says. Here are the Photoshopped images that were sent back…

“The goal of this project is to better understand potentially unrealistic standards of beauty and to see how such pressures vary around the world,” the project says.

The experiment found that…

Some of the designers kept the woman largely looking like herself, while others made her look like a new person altogether.

Some countries gave her an exaggerated hourglass figure, while others gave her an apparent BMI of 17.5, or near anorexic.

China and Italy returned the thinnest Photoshopped figures (China’s had an estimated BMI of 17), while Spain returned the heaviest.

“Beauty cannot be judged objectively, for what one person finds beautiful or admirable may not appeal to another,” the experiment concludes. “And the range of depictions found in our study appears to confirm this notion.”

Happiness At Work edition #128

You can find all of these and many more ideas in this collection …

I hope you find things here to use and enjoy.

“There are two kinds of people.  One kind, you can just tell by looking at them at what point they congealed into their final selves. It might be a very nice self, but you know you can expect no more suprises from it. Whereas, the other kind keep moving, changing… They are fluid. They keep moving forward and making new trysts with life, and the motion of it keeps them young. In my opinion, they are the only people who are still alive. You must be constantly on your guard against congealing.” 
― Gail Godwin

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